Dark Blue Van 2

The dark blue van was beat up and dirty, “Just Like Heaven” was blaring, and her little fingers were tapping on the window to the beat. She missed a few beats, but that was expected of a young girl.

“Today I went to Sarah’s house while I was waiting for you to pick me up mom!”

Distracted, but suddenly aware, Mom answered, “Oh really?”

“Yeah! And she has a little garbage can, but it’s not really a garbage can, it is full of candy!”

No response.

She couldn’t reach the button to roll down the window without grabbing the back of Mom’s chair and pulling herself forward. She pulled herself up and Mom yelled at her “Don’t touch my seat!” The girl ignored her and rolled down the window anyways.

The drive home from school is short; drive past Sarah’s house, then Clark Park, turn right, turn left, turn right, go up the hill and then home. The hill was huge to her at the time, but to older people it was small. Clark Park was her favorite place to go, the 4th of July parade was there, and you could see the fireworks from the country club perfectly.

The van pulled into the driveway and the girl ran into the garage, brother was inside playing video games. The garage was set up as movie room with couches, blankets, and mountains of junk food. She ran into the house and found the dog, Mom called it the damned dog. She repeated that once to a friend and Mom made her wash her mouth out with soap. Mom came into the house, went to her room and closed the door. Sister came home from school with a friend. Her friend always wore long sleeves, even in the summer. The girl always looked up to her, she was gorgeous and perfect. She overheard Mom and sister talking about it one day and heard that one of her arms was missing. She assumed a shark had bitten it off, she saw that happen to people on Discovery Channel’s Shark Week on T.V.

She finished her pretend homework that every young child is given in grade school. She wanted to wait up for Dad, but Mom made her go to bed.

The next day Mom was there to pick her up right after school got out. She didn’t get to go to Sarah’s house that day.

Mom took her to Clark Park to play with brother and his friends. She didn’t want to play there, she wanted to play with Sarah’s family. She asked why she couldn’t play with Sarah’s family anymore, and mom ignored her question.

Dad didn’t come home that night. He was working late.

She saw Mom and Dad having a conversation later that month. Mom was crying and Dad had a look of disappointment. He pressed all five of his fingers into the top of his forehead and massaged his temple with his thumb. He did this when he was stressed or angry, he sighed a lot too.

At church, everyone looked at her family with glancing eyes. She could hear the whispers from familiar faces, and feel them judging her and her family. Mom wouldn’t let her talk to Sarah after church anymore. She asked why. Mom answered. She didn’t understand the answer, so she asked again.

She asked again every day, and got the same answer every day.

After school Mom was late, for the first time in months. She was bored so she walked to Sarah’s house. Sarah hugged her, kissed her, and took her to the little garbage can filled with candy. She took some candy and went to play Polly Pockets with Sarah’s daughter. Going to Sarah’s was her favorite thing. She stayed there for thirty minutes, and decided she should probably leave.

She went back to the school and waited for mom to pick her up. She was really late that day. When Mom finally got there she felt guilty because she had gone to Sarah’s even though Mom had made it clear that she didn’t want her to. Mom didn’t seem focused, she was distant and sad. Mom was driving home, past Clark Park, but in her mind she was driving through darkness.

She was old enough to care about Mom and want to help her, but she was too young to formulate the question in an appropriate manner.

“Why is there a tear on your face?” She blurted

She asked in a way that made the car feel awkward, as if all the air was sucked out. Mom could feel it, but the girl couldn’t. She was too little to feel things like that.

Mom wiped it away and said she would tell her later.

That night at dinner Mom told them she was pregnant. Sister was annoyed, that would be her fourth sibling, she didn’t want to be a huge annoying family, like the ones at church with seven kids. Dad wasn’t surprised, and he didn’t talk much that dinner. In fact, he hadn’t talked much at any dinner recently.

The next Sunday at church the girl felt the same eyes and whispers, she had felt them for over a month now. And she knew why. After church everyone gathered in the foyer to talk, half went to Sarah’s side and the other half came to her family’s side.

A couple more weeks went by, with awkward interactions, and an underwhelming presence of Mom and Dad. The little girl got sick of staying at her friends’ houses all day everyday. She wanted to be with her family more.

It was that time right before spring, the hardest time; everyone is sick of winter, and waiting for spring to bring everything good back. Random snow showers came and went, along with some beloved warm days. Warm being a low 45 degrees of course. Usually the warm days would bring a sense of happiness and hope into the house, but not this year. The winter was still lingering at home.

After church one Sunday, with the flock of people split into two, the girl walked up to Sarah. She was so pretty in her sunflower dress, the girl tugged at the hem of the dress. All eyes turned to her and watched. She looked up at Sarah and said, “I know why my family can’t play with your family anymore.”

She captured the attention of people on both sides of the foyer. People gasped and fidgeted with horrified looks on their faces.

Sarah’s face was even more horrified than everyone elses, she tried to conceal it but she couldn’t. She was about to be completely humiliated in front of a hundred people by a little girl.

And she stumbled out her answer, “Because you and my dad had a ina-inaprop-ri-ate relationship.”

There was silence for a while, nobody dared speak a sound. They had already spread their whispers for the past months, but were too cowardly to do it now.

The girls comment was clearly told to her previously and had been simply been repeated like a parrot repeats something after it has been told multiple times.

The girl thought she heard Mom giggle a little when she made her comment, she had finally gotten some attention from Mom after months of none. She felt encouraged to do more, she ran around laughing at Sara. Mom tried to hide her slight satisfaction with the public humiliation that Sarah was receiving. Mom had felt the same public humiliation for a while now, and secretly liked to see it on Sarah.

Sarah left, and so did Dad and Mom, everyone else waited inside until both of our families had driven off. They couldn’t stand to be around the awkwardness anymore.

Dark Blue Van

The dark blue van was beat up and dirty, “Just Like Heaven” was blaring, and her little fingers were tapping on the window to the beat. She missed a few beats, but that was expected of a young girl.

“Today I went to Sarah’s house while I was waiting for you to pick me up mom!”

Distracted, but suddenly aware, Mom answered, “Oh really?”

“Yeah! And she has a little garbage can, but it’s not really a garbage can, it is full of candy!”

No response.

She couldn’t reach the button to roll down the window without grabbing the back of Mom’s chair and pulling herself forward. She pulls herself up and Mom yells at her “Don’t touch my seat!” She ignores her and rolls down the window.

The drive home from school is short, past Sarah’s house, then Clark Park, turn right, turn left, turn right, go up the hill and then home.

The van pulled into the driveway and she ran into the garage, brother was inside playing video games. The garage was full of couches, blankets, candy, and junk food. She ran into the house and found the dog, Mom called it the damned dog. She repeated that once to a friend and got in trouble. Mom came into the house, went to her room and closed the door. Sister came home from school with a friend. Her friend always wore long sleeves, even in the summer. She overheard Mom and sister talking about it one day and heard that one of her arms is missing. She assumed a shark had bitten it off, she saw that happen to people on shark week on T.V.

She finished her pretend homework that every young child is given in grade school. She wanted to wait up for Dad, but Mom made her go to bed.

The next day Mom was there to pick her up right after school got out. She didn’t get to go to Sarah’s house that day.

Mom took her to Clark Park to play with brother and his friends. She didn’t want to play there she wanted to play with Sarah’s family. She asked why she couldn’t play with Sarah’s family anymore, and mom ignored her question.

Dad didn’t come home that night. He was working late.

She saw Mom and Dad having a conversation later that month. Mom was crying and Dad had a look of disappointment. He pressed all five of his fingers into the top of his forehead and massaged his temple with his thumb. He did this when he was stressed or angry, he sighed a lot too.

At church everyone looked at her family with glancing eyes. She could hear the whispers from familiar faces, and feel them judging her and her family. Mom wouldn’t let her talk to Sarah after church anymore. She asked why. Mom answered. She didn’t understand the answer, so she asked again.

She asked again every day, and got the same answer every day.

After school Mom was late, for the first time in months. She was bored so she walked to Sarah’s house. Sarah hugged her, kissed her, and took her to the little garbage can filled with candy. She took some candy and went to play Polly Pockets with Sarah’s daughter. Going to Sarah’s was her favorite thing. She stayed there for thirty minutes, and decided she should probably leave.

She went back to the school and waited for mom to pick her up. She was really late that day. When Mom finally got there she felt guilty because she had gone to Sarah’s even though Mom had made it clear that she didn’t want her to. Mom didn’t seem focused, she was distant and sad. Mom was driving home, past Clark Park, but in her mind she was driving through darkness.

She was old enough to care about Mom and want to help her, but she was too young to formulate the question in an appropriate manner.

“Why is there a tear on your face?” She blurted

Mom wiped it away and said she had some news.

That night at dinner Mom told them she was pregnant. Sister was annoyed, that would be her fourth sibling, she didn’t want to be a huge annoying family, like the ones at church with seven kids. Dad wasn’t surprised, and he didn’t talk much that dinner. In fact, he hadn’t talked much at any dinner recently.

The next Sunday at church she felt the same eyes and whisper, she had felt them for over a month now. And she knew why. After church everyone gathered in the foyer to talk, half went to Sarah’s side and the other half came to her family’s side.

She walked up to Sarah, she was so pretty in her sunflower dress, and tugged at the hem of the dress. All eyes turned to her and watched. She looked up at Sarah and said, “I know why my family can’t play with your family anymore.”

She captured the attention of people on both sides of the foyer. People gasped and fidgeted with horrified looks on their faces.

“Why is that?” Sarah asked.

And she stumbled out her answer, “Because you and my dad had a ina-inaprop-ri-ate relationship.”

A Principle to Keep

The human race claims to uphold principles and morals. Many people contemplate disobeying these morals multiple times in their lives, some more than others. 

Morals tell us as people what we should or shouldn't do. Some are personal, while others are more lawfully backed. 

It is in human nature to act morally, therefore, one who acts morally is better pleased with himself than one who does not act morally. 

Since the first homo sapiens, people have had the choice to act morally or not to. A paper written on early human mortality suggests that those who prospered in early human life were the ones who chose a moral living standard.

Humans who live morally are happier, and have greater success. Humans who don't live this way are caught up in wrong doings, sadness, and despair; they don't prosper.

There are many principles that are considered moral, and that should be upheld in order to maintain the moral nature of humans. The most prominent of these, is to care for the people around you. Humans should recognize the struggles and imperfections of others around them and try to help them. 

Modern morals don't hold this principle as high as it should be. Humans are becoming more and more distant from each other, and they aren't able to help each other anymore. 

Like I said earlier about people disobeying morals, many people don't uphold principles that should be kept. These can be big or small principles, there is always a part of the human mind that will question the right answer, or path.

Thanksgiving

This Thanksgiving I am grateful for all of the interesting conversations we have in this English class. I'm thankful for all of the smart people in this class and for all of their input and knowledge that they give. I'm thankful for my group work buddies, Alex, Peter, and Dillon because they're smart and funny. I'm thankful for all the kids in the class that say stuff in the discussions when the rest of us are too scared, tired, or just too stupid to say anything. I'm thankful for all of you. Happy thanksgiving!

I Celebrate Myself

In society today it is hard for most people to express themselves for who they really are. People are afraid of judgement, and often do not even realize who they actually are. There is a sense of conformity that almost everyone follows, they go through trouble to be who they should be, not who they are. If people could realize how much potential they had, and how much they could accomplish; great things would happen. Everyone is different, they should't try to be something else, or be held back by societies  
views and restrictions.
During Thoreau's time everyone was focused on self realization and self thinking. People wanted to find out things for themselves and learn and become great things. Now, most people don't strive to gain knowledge and understanding of their capabilities.
The ability to celebrate yourself is extremely valuable and helpful when you are trying to accomplish things. With celebration of your abilities, and self realization, you are confident and better able to do things that are tough. Confidence is key in life, without it it is very hard to try new things and be social.

Poe

When Poe was two years old his mother died, and his father had already left the family. The Allan family adopted him and he began writing in his early teen years. He was always writing. He went to The University of Virginia and gambled to get money to pay off his debt but that didn't work, his only choice was to leave the school. He later applied to West Point, after schooling he began working as a writer full time. He started as a critic for newspapers and magazines. Many people saw him as the harshest critic. He released multiple works in the book, Tales of the Grotesque and Arabesque.

Because Poe wrote in first person and he wrote about Opium many people thought he used drugs when he wrote. All of his horror works, mystery works, and vampire works led people to be confused by him and they saw him as a kind of dark presence. Poe's death was equally mysterious as his stories, he was found roaming the streets of of Baltimore and taken to the hospital. A few days after arriving at the hospital he died, the true reason is unknown, like all of his stories it was very mysterious and "unwritten."

What is an American?

Technically an American is someone who lives in America, but most commonly Americans are people who live in The United States.
What I think describes an American is someone who lives in America, and who has experience in all types of cultures. The U.S. is known as the melting pot for a reason, there are so many types of people, religions, and cultures here. To live here and not have experienced at least two different cultures in your life is nearly impossible.
To be and American also involves being free, or that is what it's supposed to mean, when explorers came to America they were seeking a few things but freedom was a main treasure they wanted. An important group that came were the Puritans, seeking a new world of their own, without people with different beliefs.
Another part of Americas history that shows freedom was the conflict between newly formed Americans and Britain to establish a new and free people.
To be an American is to be culturally diverse, to be free, free of religious conflict, free of slavery, and free of persecution.